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18/04/2009

19

(Clockwise) Pete and Jimbo, Ballon Ballai, Matt's broken leg, Jill(Skiworld), Jen's 3 valley rally team, Boss des Bosses team

Can you believe it's been over 19 weeks since we first met? Very soon we will all go in our different directions, off into the real world. On your return to the UK and reality in a couple of weeks the prospect of a "proper" job and a living wage might seem appealing right now but given a couple of weeks of standing on an overcrowded underground train with a stranger's armpit invading your personal space, the joy of breathing top quality polluted air and the seemingly endless struggle to make your new salary cover your exorbitant living expenses, you will soon feel the withdrawal symptoms from a drug to which you have become unknowingly addicted. The mountains. You will then find you spend the next 6 months coming to terms with your addiction. Few will be able to resist the addictive allure of the Alps. Many will survive with only an occasional relapse that can be effectively treated with a week back on the slopes. Others will find they can only survive by getting another five-month fix next winter. As the Eagles described in their own admission of addiction and excess, Hotel California, "you can check out any time you like but you can never leave". You might go home but you always leave a little piece of you behind. You have been warned. See some of you next winter....

Alex, the editor.

2008-2009 summary
Piggy’s is turned into yet another estate agent. Gallery Café ne Bar L'Equipe is replaced by Oxygen. Hotel de la Croisette is under new French management. Jimbo stays in charge of Bar Le Jump. Jack Wills provide Jumps staff shirts and underpants. Courche “Porsche” style t-shirts go on sale. Someone parks an eco plane inside the Croisette outside Credit Agricole. Pete and Jimbo(Jump) start lift streaking. Adam(Inghams) wins Armada skis at Natives Show love tour. Skival go all nativity for Christmas. Jesus(Skival) dresses up as…. Jesus. Lucy(TJ’s) slices finger needs stitches. Debbie injures knee and is given personal medical attention from Matt(Jump). CCTV camera are dotted around Courchevel. Mainly looking outside Jump and Kalico. Pringles renamed nanny snacks.Powder White make in into the final of the ballon ballai and are beaten by Magic Mushrooms (again). Jill(Skiworld) pulls an oldie on her pub crawl. Weekly poker games start in Jump basement. Matt pulls Sasha(Total). Jen absent from Meribel Workers challenge race for first time. Toni(Inghams) injures foot. Monika does a fish impression on the dancefloor. Tor(Skiworld) snoggs Gemma in Kailco. Debbie does articles starts. Jimbo wears Lucy’s agent provocateur pink panties. Resort overrun by a convoy of german SUV driving arabs. Will Gill shags Zoe(Supertravel) on ISBA pool table before leaving resort. Ski Instrcutor Matt Ottaway breaks femur in two places.14 millions euro chalet burns down. Freddie gets a promotion from the kitchen to Jump bar staff. Jesus passes out in his pouch of Golden Virginia on the king table. Hetty and Tor(Skiworld) get busy with Ryan and Jesus(Skival). Despite an amazing performances from all the team (and the best team t-shirts) Courchevel comes last in the 20th Boss des Bosses. Zermatt wins again. 15 minutes before the start Jen finds racer Lara Crisp for her "While your down there Jump bar" and wins the three valley rally for the third time. Nearly half of the 25 teams get lost in La Tania and stop for lunch. Amy(TJ’s) dislocates elbow. Custom made Natives hoodies finally materialise 12 months late. The question was the red or the green? Ski Higher team win 1st ever Magic in Motion Seasonnaire invitational race. Will Gill finally leaves resort. 1650 gets very hairy as Mo-March. Emma Bladon returns for a very drunken week. Claire, Ben & Matt propose cycling home for Charity. Jump bar closes incredibly early. End of season ball in Chalet de Pierres is a great success.Livewire play through the night. Simon “the forest” Hooper in a mankini takes taste and decency to a new low. Jimbo starts work in Refuge bar. Kalico closes. Resort closes. Season ends.

End of Season Ball
Once again Chalet de Pierres did an excellent job hosting the ball. Every years they out do themselves in being nice and hospitable. With the early closing of the Jump bar the before dinner drinks where included.
Every time food is mentioned at the ball it always comes under a lot of scrutiny especially as many of the seasonnaires are accomplished chefs. Are the portions tiny? Is it worth the price?
This year, once again, in my opinion it couldn't be faulted. From the very large goat's cheese salad starter to the amazing, and I don't use that word inadvisable, tart tatine desert was worthy of Chalet de Pierres quality. And finally the band, Livewire, in my opinion, are one of the best in the alps. From the guitar antics of Diego to the dance competition hosted by Hoops it made it a truly memorable evening.
The end of season awards
The award for the most popular girl (a politically correct way of saying Slapper) was won (by only 2 votes) by Bex (Neilson).
The award for biggest male slapper was a very close two horse race between Russell(Skihigher) and Matt(Jump) who collectively have worked their way through nearly the entire female population of Courchevel, was won by Matt(Jump).
Quote of the season was won by Pete(Jump) after he brought the term “Ass Clown” into the Courchevel dictionary.
By a virtual landslide Abi(Skiworld) took the most talk it up award after purchasing a very expensive pair of skis that matched her ski outfit despite only using them on the Pralong run!
The best story of the season went to Jimbo(Jump) and Lucy(TJ’s) for their agent provacteur pantie sharing incident. The last award, a personal thank you from the editor, was presented to Debbie(Inghams). Since issue 10 Debbie has written a little article called “Debbie does” covering a wide range of topics from demis to apres ski.

Naked Fridays
Although there has been alot of nudity throughout the season it always seems that flesh is on display in TJ’s. Usually as a result from spending the evening in the Ronnie. The catalyst for this night appeared to be Jen(Kili), who after a bottle of toffee vodka, was flashing her bra at every oppotunity. It was only a matter of time before she got behind the bar and started to strip all the patrons. Basically anyone who wanted a drink had to remove their top. Before long there was more flesh on dispay than a butchers window.