As I start my 10 season in
Courchevel I would like to start by welcoming and warning all the seasonnaires in resort. Those who have been here a couple of weeks have probably already met me. Those who haven't met me have probably been warned by their resort manager. It's all lies I tell you.
This first edition is just an introduction to some of the barstaff and a warning that you are now at hazard of making an appearance in the coming months. If you make an appearance in the paper, know this. It's nothing personal. It was probably one of your co-workers who told me the story, I don't hate you and by next week everyone will have forgotten those dizzy heights of fame you reached and be concentrating on this weeks star.
They say that first impressions are very important and within the first couple minutes of meeting someone for the first time you can tell an awful lot about them. It's the same when it comes to seasons. If a day after a ski company arrives in resort I start hearing humorous anecdotes about a certain person I know that he will appear on my radar many times over the next five months.
Our first victim unfortunately has moved on to his permanent home in Val d'Isere were if his week in
Courchevel is anything to go by I think
SkivalÃs Val resort manager Sarah should keep the emergency services on speed dial.The towering figure of
Neil(skival) managed to leave a wake of destruction behind him. Not only getting drunk with the best of the Courchevel old school; took the blame for placing a coat over a lit candle in L'Equipe resulting in a Veste Flambe; Passed out in the poubelle on his way back from Gringos.
Scoring one for the home team was Dan, who as well as working behind the bar in Gringos (and being barred from his own bar) is rather partial to several pints of wine's poverty stricken brother. Anyway after a night of imbibing more than his fair share, Dan was what might be described as hammered, wasted, blasted, smashed, plastered, soused, pickled, sloshed, being three sheets to the wind or just plain fall on the floor drunk. Luckily (for me) SkivalÃs wile Swede
Mik(Isba) was at hand to pick him off the road and in exchange for carrying him home granted him this exclusive
interview. It went something like this
Mik: So Dan are you gay?**
Dan: yeaaaaahhhhhh.
Mik: Do you like cock?**
Dan: yeaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh
Mik: Do you like blowing goats?**
Dan: yeaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh
You can see were this is leading, suffice to say Dan would have admitted to almost anything.
Mik: Were you the third man on the grassy knoll (in Dallas)
Dan: yeeaaaaaaah
Mik: Were you responsible for the fall of the Berlin wall and the whole economic collapse of the whole Russian communist state.
Dan: no.that was mainly down to Mikhail Gorbachev restructuring the economyÃs production and distribution system known as perestroika.
**I would like to make it clear that such an interrogation under duress doesn't put into question Dan sexuality in anyway.
